Question:
I had a bad fall and my confidence has gone help :(:(?
anonymous
2013-04-05 04:33:16 UTC
I had a fall a year ago from my horse whilst I was show jumping, I broke my hip and pelvis and was in hospital for a while so I have had a year off, I loaned my horse out for that time now I have got her back and want to get back in to it properly but my confidence has been shattered no one understands they just say " you have to just move on and get over it" but no one understands it feels like i have something wrong with me i am not even scared of falling off i just dont even know :(, I have considered hypnotherapy?? my horse is not a novice ride she is forward going but not unsafe.. i just do not know what to do it is so horrible i was a very good rider competing at a high level, now i feel useless and crap ! someone please help me! its getting on my nerves now and probably my horses to!
Seven answers:
Anna
2013-04-05 11:04:25 UTC
i was thrown from a horse and broke my shoulder. i also lost my confidence and i know how you feel. At first i was so nervous and i didn't know why. my riding instructor put me on a gentle horse and how it helped.

First just start off on the ground and get really comfortable with the daily routine: mucking out, grooming, catching...when you are ready just walk around with someone with you, maybe a lead rein if you want. There is no rush, just take your time. Rather than wishing you were brilliant again just focus on your riding at the moment because you will just feel annoyed and crap. It is hard but going back to basics and ironing out any mistakes in your riding may make you a better rider overall.

I slowly got my confidence back and now feel i am a better rider, particularly in canter and not getting worried because horses can sense your fear. Try meditation or talking to someone about why you love riding and what you feel has changed since your fall, then you may be able to work out why.



You are the only person who can get your confidence back and so make sure that everything is at your pace. Riding is something to enjoy and so don't feel pressured into doing stuff you don't want to. People are only trying to help but you also have to think positively about yourself...don't get down and you will be fine. GOOD LUCK!!!!!!!!:)
?
2013-04-05 12:34:52 UTC
i had this problem last year when i fell and broke my collarbone then got back on and damaged my back. i competed often at at a decent level and i am getting back to that but i am not there yet, it takes a long time and i have had a lot of support (which i definitely needed in the times when i felt like giving up).



people also said to me that i should just get on but there is 'the wall'. i just got advice from my friends (who usually got me shouting at them in return) and they didn't force me to do anything, just reassured me that i could ride etc. you could try having private lessons with a recommended instructor who is good for rebuilding confidence. also, riding a safe horse who you know won't do anything and on the lunge doing some exercises like no reins etc.



make sure that no one forces you to do anything. take things at your own pace and make sure that you are happy with what you are doing.
lanibug1001
2013-04-05 05:29:15 UTC
Nobody says you have to just get on and automatically start jumping again; pretty much just start from scratch, if you need to start on a lead line again and when you feel more comfortable you can move to a lunge line or by yourself. Perhaps you can loan a quieter horse in the meantime.
?
2013-04-05 04:37:41 UTC
The Old Saying "Get back on and ride is true. Just start off slow and it will gradually come back to you. Don't try anything fancy just get used ot being on the horse again.
anonymous
2013-04-05 04:57:38 UTC
If it helps, you can start off again by having someone lead the horse while you sit on it. Then gradually start going on your own, having someone watch you. Then go onto trots, etc. And try to relax, most importantly.
anonymous
2013-04-05 09:51:58 UTC
Ride an older bomb proof horse.... Start with just grooming her...the next day tack her up...lunge her see how she is....then start with getting on and walk...eventually moving to a trot and canter...it will take time but you can't have fear...be confident...
?
2013-04-05 16:17:19 UTC
Totally understand you. My story is similar, but not the same. I have never competed, nor I probably ever will. I'm not scared of falling, but I'm just scared to approach the jump. And I feel like carp too. I see many older and younger riders that started after me and now the jump 4 feet and where am I? Nowhere. It is weird. Like when you want something so much, but it just won't happen. And you can do nothing about it. I know how it feels. And sometimes I jump fine on small jumps, but the next day I'm afraid again. All you need to do is to use evry opportunity given to you and realize there are ups and downs for everyone. My day ended in tears today, because things are not the way I want them to be. I'm sure you're an excellent rider, but the injury you had is really serious. You cannot get over it, it will stay forever, but you can do many things about it. Talk to your trainer or someone about what caused your fall. Were you not ready for that height? Was it your or your horse mistake? What didn't you do that you probably had to do? Talking about the problem and fully understanding what happened can help you with your future riding. It is like if you ate a rotten sandwich. You wouldn't want to eat another, because it might be rotten too. But you have to realize that not all sandwiches are bad, and just because you stumble upon a bad one, it doesn't mean you have to stop eating all of them. All riders know that falling and injuries are part of riding, and will eventually happen to all of us. Some are small and some are serious, but most falls are the ones where only your pride is hurt. And people rarely get bad falls more than once. I know you need to get your confidence back, maybe start on a schoolmaster horse for a first few trainings. Don't push yourself, ever. Give yourself tasks to do, from going to a fast trot and steady cantering at the end of the month. Then add some poles to go over, and it will certainly come back to you. We learn from our falls and mistakes, and it cannot always be the way we want it and you have to accept it. Take lounge lessons if you feel better. And don't plan your trainings. Don't say to yourself something like you must jump 3 feet today. Go to the training, and do what you feel like doing. No pressure around. Just you and your horse. Feel the movement, feel the freedom horse gives you and don't think about the fall. That moment, the moment you're sitting in the saddle, is your present, not past. What happened in the past will always be there, but don't let your past decide your future. Take all the time you need. Not all falls will end like this, and the more you think about it, the more scary it gets. It gets worse. I have no confidence at all. I envy others, I'm jealous, and I fear a lot. And I never had serious fall, just bad trainers who pushed me to jump too early, when I was not ready. And I will probably carry it whole my life. I might not make it to the competitions. But still, I'm not giving up. It is worth it. Riding is my life, and when there's no riding it means no life. So death. And even tough I think about suicide sometimes, I want to live. Just think about happy and successful moments. Bad times and memories will come from time to time, but they are gone most of the time. Bad rider is not the one who falls, but one who doesn't get up after it. You are still an excellent rider. Maybe it is hiding somewhere deep in you now, but that rider will raise again. You now only think about this fall. And what about all your previous competitions, shows you had, amazing jumps you did? What about them, don't you remember them? You didn't used to be a good rider, you still are. But you can't get it out of you. I know you're scared, I am too. And I could go on and on about this. No one expects you to get out of the hospital and jump oxers tomorrow, nor you should expect it from yourself. Understanding the fall and patience is the key to this. Knowing what was wrong that time will help you to not do it the next time. I feel like something is wrong with me too. And it is all the time...Why a 50 year old woman can jump higher than me when she is a worse rider? That is one of my questions in my head. And list goes on. It is weird. It hurts and sometimes I cry a lot like tonight. But I just have to believe it will get better, and so do you. This fall was stronger than your bones, but it is not stronger than you. And after all, the physical wounds have healed. Now it is all in your head. I still have problems, and sometimes they come back to my head and I just cry. But when I enter an arena to train, it just happens. I approach the jump, and the next moment I'm galloping towards another. And fear goes away, but comes back tomorrow. I'm not getting over it, I'm learning to live with it. Once you learn to live with it, it goes away.


This content was originally posted on Y! Answers, a Q&A website that shut down in 2021.
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